Thank you for joining me! My name is Shain, and I am honored to be the founder of Unguided Gentleman. My life’s journey has been rich with experiences that have deeply influenced my values and the mission of this organization.
I grew up in a household that lacked a father figure,a situation that presented both challenges and opportunities for growth. The absence of paternal guidance meant that I often had to navigate life's complexities on my own. This led me to step into a caregiver role, assisting my mother in raising my siblings from a young age. Through this experience, I learned about responsibility, sacrifice, and the importance of familial support. I assumed duties that went beyond simple sibling interactions, stepping up to help with everything from household chores to emotional support.
As I entered my teenage years, life became more tumultuous. The struggles of adolescence can be particularly overwhelming, and I found myself grappling with feelings of confusion and resentment. During this period, I unfortunately turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms, including alcohol and prescription pills, seeking relief from the pressures I faced. These choices often led to deeper struggles, leaving me feeling isolated and adrift.
However, a turning point came after I graduated from high school. Motivated by my desire to create a different legacy for my children, I made a conscious decision to become a father who provides not just for his family, but who also offers emotional availability and guidance. Determined to break the cycle I had experienced, I drew inspiration from my grandfather, a man who instilled in me strong values of hard work and integrity. His example encouraged me to commit wholeheartedly to my family.
For the past thirteen years, I have dedicated myself to building a stable and loving environment for my own family while pursuing a career as a fifth-generation union pipefitter. This occupation has been both rewarding and challenging, offering significant financial benefits that help support our family’s needs, as well as instilling a sense of pride in carrying on a family tradition of skilled craftsmanship.
While the trades offer considerable Financial benefits also often require travel that can interfere with medical appointments and personal care. The demands of working seven days a week for twelve hours a day can be physically taxing, leading to missed opportunities for important milestones, holidays, and birthdays. It can be quite challenging to witness a spouse managing household responsibilities alone while maintaining connections with children through a screen. The guilt; depression,and feelings of loneliness became compounded with alcohol and substances to numb the pain; despite trying to fill the void, I ultimately was obscuring the fundamental values in life.
I came to recognize that being away from home limited my ability to support my partner and engage meaningfully in my children’s lives. When my friend decided to leave, taking the kids with her, I understood her right to pursue what was best for her family. Reflecting on this journey evokes a sense of frustration and a desire for guidance during those difficult moments. I have learned that no amount of work can substitute for the precious years spent away from loved ones.
My experiences during the years spent away from loved ones have significantly influenced my perspective on mental health, particularly for men. This understanding has fostered a sense of empathy for those who may feel isolated and disconnected from their support networks. It is apparent that many men confront challenges such as addiction, depression, and self-doubt, often in silence and without adequate support.
In response to this insight, I established a brand focused on raising awareness about men’s mental health issues and providing access to essential resources. My intention is to cultivate a community that promotes open dialogue and fosters mutual understanding among individuals facing these challenges.
I am dedicated to reaching out to those who are struggling, extending compassion and support as they navigate their unique circumstances. I believe that the potential for joy and fulfillment exists for everyone, and my aim is to help individuals recognize and harness that potential. Empowering them to lead lives filled with purpose is a priority, as is guiding them through various life complexities.
Having faced feelings of being lost myself, I truly understand the difficulties that can arise. By sharing my journey and insights, my hope is to inspire others to find their own paths toward healing and personal growth. Together, we have the opportunity to challenge the stigma associated with mental health and foster a more supportive environment for all men to flourish. I aim to foster a greater understanding of the importance of support systems, personal growth, and the pursuit of balance in our lives.
Thank you for being a part of this journey with me.
SINCERELY
Shain
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